What's This All About?

In my words and pictures you will see my life ~ the good days and the better days. (Are there any other type of days?) The title of this blog is inspired by my Late Aunt Lily who lived to see 100 years who always stated "if you don't use you'll lose it". This is all about how we use life to win (never lose) at it according to me!

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Throwback Thursdays - Don't Call it a Comeback...Again

Hi All, Due to popular demand, I thought that I would resurrect my Blog.  I will use this as a vehicle to post to FaceBook and share my continued, sometimes rambling thoughts, dreams, hopes, etc.  I hope you enjoy.  So happy to find my voice again, because as the saying goes.... "If you don't use it, you'll lose it."

First Post, totally a rewrite from my FB post, sorry lazy today!

Before there were the M&M'S there was you.... I couldn't figure out how my my heart could fit any more love because of how full I was of love with you. But then YOU showed me how to love more. The love, you, the Big "Bro"ski have for your sis and bro is undeniable and a bond I'm so proud of. I treasure our rare one on one moments. From our dance contest while waiting for the Doc, to your common sense advice to you explaining the troubles you were having with your "archenemies" as like the Superman and Lex Luther of school, to compliments about my hair, to encouraging my workout efforts to our beat box and rapping collabo's YOU made my heartbeat have meaning. I heart you to infinity TIMES infinity...

Me and My Nemo Spedeemo aka Big Broski aka Eddie!

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Ma, Mommy, Mom, Mama!!!!!

Ma, Mommy, Mama, Mom, Mommy, Mom, Ma, Mommy....Repeat... THIS WAS MY LAST POST IN MSY OF 2011, never posted, was in draft mode after reading it, I see/feel my pain and happiness....Ready to blog again, ENJOY!.

How many times do you think to yourself, "I wish this child would stop calling me"?  I think I got to the bottom as to why our children call our names so much...Because there is going to come a time, where they will call our names and we will not answer...

Mother's Day has come and gone.  This is such a bittersweet time because my Mom, the late great Glenda P. Boyd is now in Heaven.  She entered into eternal rest, Sunday, February 2, 2002.  There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about her.  Somedays,you can find me talking to myself, just saying Mommy, other days you may find me doubled over in emotional despair crying out for my Mommy.

I know everyone means well, when they do their best to reach out..."It gets better with time", "GOD never gives you more than you can bare", "You're so strong"  I KNOW that none of these people have gone through what I've gone through.  I also know that they want to do anything to take away my pain and despair. 

She chin-checked me without raising her voice
She gave me St. Patrick's Day cards and cooked corned beef and cabbage to celebrate our Irishness
She took the sides of others when it was right
She loved me despite me disappointing her
She never not said "I Love You"

I feel so selfish, in that it is hard to appreciate Mother's Day when I am blessed with my own child. 

Use It Moment"
Use the day to soak in the day with your child.  Do something extra special for the both of you.  Nemo and I planted flowers at the house for my Mom, Aunt Lily and Nala.  I love him so very much.  Even though he is a Daddy's Boy, I know he has a special place for me in his heart! 

He gave me the best Mother's Day Card:

He regifted his Valentine's Day gift and gave it to me:

He ended the night telling me that, what I thought was a semi-sexy Vera Wang cotton nightgown was a "nice Pirate outfit"

Lose It Moment
I have had the unfortunate experience of losing my Mother and there are some days that I am paralyzed by this feeling.  We were one.  She raised me as a single Mom, and I was her only child.

I woke up, drove myself over to ElmCity CrossFit, got a WOD in (was a little unfocused, hence, the bruised shins, I didn't realize it then, but my head was elsewhere...) went over to the City Seed Farmer's Market over at Edgewood Park and then came home to my wonderful son, who was riding his bike with the band hat from his Halloween costume and his puffy vest!

He opened up my car door, let me out and told me that he was going to make me breakfast!  (That quickly changed when I pulled out his pretzel from the Farmer's Market.  LOL!)

Lose that feeling of not wanting to hear the words Mom, Ma, Mommy...because for:
  • those children yound and old who can no longer call out for their Mom
  • those mothers who have lost their children
  • those mothers who time has not come yet.  As my friend stated in his Mother's Day Wish, " including those who desire to be mothers but whose dream has yet to be realized. Be patient and stay in good spirit."
they would want nothing more than say it one more time or once again hear their children's voices, or get that opportunity to be called those special names.

Father, GOD, thank you for allowing me to be the daughter of Glenda P. Boyd. 

Thank you for putting the mother roles in my life to help keep me...Nonnie, Mamacita, Pat, Mrs. Smith, and Yvonne to name a few.

Thank you for all of Nemo's Auntie's...Rhonda, Steph, Nat, Titi Ril, Titi Marinelly, Chan, Purty, Nic, Cheryl, Heather, Lisa, Tasha, Debbie,

To all of Auntie Thai's babies, that taught me how to be a Mom before I was a Mom, I love you.  You know I'm your favorite Auntie!!!!

Thank you even more for allowing me to give birth to my precious baby boy.  Eddie, Nemo, Junior, Bubba, Pops, Mikey, EJ, Little Ed, Coosaman, Papasan, Figurinha.  At the end of the day, he is my son and I am his Mom! 

Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Art of the Dougie

"They be like smoove 'what?', can you teach me how to Dougie?" 

What is it about those few words, that gets people bouncin' onto the dance floor?  Is it the beat?  (pretty basic) Is it the lyrics? (couldn't possibly be).

To me, it's a feelgood "throwback" to hip hop.  Ol' Skool' realizes that it's a gift to the original Doug E. Fresh.  When we went to the TJMS Family Reunion last year, Doug E. Fresh recognized Cali Swag District for their embracing of ol skool hip hop.  It was a GREAT moment on stage (amongst many...If you have never been to a TJMS event, I encourage you to do so TFAD!)

Doug E. Fresh discusses the impact of "The Dougie" and the moment that we saw them on stage together in Florida!

Use this song to show YOUR Dougie.  Everybody's doing it. 

Chris Brown

Wolf Blitzer

My First Lady Michelle Obama - Get Me Bodied is one of my Favorite Party Songs Eva!  Beyonce Remade the Song for the Fight Against Childhood Obesity Campaign.  The FLOTUS Dougie is in the beginning part of the video.  I don't know about you, but I <3 "friend in my head" Michelle!

At this point, you might as well lose the feeling of hating the Dougie.  Embrace it!  All you have to do is...
"Put your arms out front, lean side to side"....

My "nephew" Jalen and "niece" Cori getting it in

I'm impartial, but my ABSOLUTE favortist is the video below!  Nemo on the Dougie, me on lyrics and video!

Check out the bonus video of our girlfriend family Holiday gathering.  Watch Nemo!  LOL!  It was all fun and games until the countdown started at the end!  LOL!  Thanks Uncle Rik for catching all of the video!  LOL!

Monday, May 2, 2011

Happily Ever After

4:40A Friday Morning, my alarm went off...Not for the Royal Wedding, as I was tired of hearing about it, but my alarm goes off every morning at 4:40A.  My intention was to get over to ElmCity CrossFit and go HAM on the WOD!  Instead, I awoke to the Royal Wedding on every channel, grabbed my blanket and went downstairs to begin watching it....

I was glued to the TV, just as I was as a 7 year old little girl laid out across Aunt Lilly's bed with her two poodles Todd & Cherie watching Princess Diana and Prince Charles marry 30 years earlier.  Ummmm, did I just date myself?  I think I did...Oh well! 

Me, Aunt Lily and Nonnie at my bridal shower back in 2003

First, I was mesmerized by the fashion of the hats and pieces of the Brits.  I loved the edginess of some and the delicate beauty of others. 

Next, was the car game.  Rolls Royce's, Range Rover's, Aston Martin's, Jaguars....I have never been a car girl, but great gooogly moogly those were some BAD cars!

It wasn't until I saw Prince's William and Harry emerge that my heart just skipped a beat.  I watched the two of them come out and I began to cry like a baby.  I felt like a Mom watching my babies grow from boys to men.  Prince William, the face and mannerisms of his mother, Lady Di, dazzled us all in his regal uniform.  Watching the brothers make their entrance to the car was unbelievable.  How great to watch them together on the royal stage together.  This time so much different than the last time back in September of 1997, we remember trailing behind their "Mummy", heads down, faces confused.

One of the saddest days caught on TV
"This is mad"
William such a King in waiting
Harry is such a "bad boy" <3 him, crazy hair and all!
Checking out his sister-in-law, so sneaky...knowing Wills can't turn around!

When Katie entered the fishbowl car, we could not wait to see her full gown at Westminster Abbey.  She, like her sister Pippa did not disappoint in Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen (another British fashion icon genius).  Perfectly fit to her, for her, she was radiant (although I feel they should have steamed out her veil a little better, added a little more padding/cups, and the train could have been longer - more dramatic).  Who would have thought that she could be any more beautiful than she already is!
Get it Pippa!
Their eyes say so much to each other...Naughty boy!

I ended up having to go to work as soon as the ceremony was through.  But thanks to the magic of replay, I was able to catch the infamous Buckingham Palace scenes.  The now Duchess of Cambridge Catherine coming out and saying "wow" to the adoring royal watchers before her and William asking for the kiss.  We know that wasn't the first kiss as a married couple, but it was enough for us.  Finally, the peak over her shoulder as if to say, "I need to savor this moment, it can't be real..."

Yes, Duchess Catherine of Cambridge..."this is real!"

Admittedly, I believe, ok, I know that I became a bit obsessed.  But every little girl grows up wishing her Prince Charming comes and sweeps her off her feet and then you live Happily Ever After.  The beautiful gown, the shiny tiara, , the glass slipper, the carriage ride, the first dance, the flawless makeup, the march down the aisle, the consistent whispers of I Love You, the home full of well behaved happy children.  On Friday morning, I was able to feel like that little girl again.  Because, I don't care what you say, no one does it like the Royals....This was "No TV Week", as determined by the school, but between me and you, when I woke Nemo up, I reminded him that this is how every Prince should treat his Princess.  How happy was I to see, that he too, was mesmerized.  I think it was moreso the parade than anything else!

My Fairy Tale Moment
My Prince in Waiting on Easter Sunday

OMG!  There was so much cynicism on FaceBook, in the office, on the radio.  I get it, royal watching is not for everyone, especially men.  Sorry fella's.  But, even if you were not into the royal wedding, LOSE the whole Will and Kate thing!  We know that life throws us curve balls, lemons, everything that glitters ain't gold and all of that other bad stuff.  BELIEVE ME I KNOW!!!!  We know that even when you find your Prince or Princess it takes hard work and a lot of blood, sweat and tears to fill in those not so blue skies between the Fairy Tale wedding and the Happily Ever After (TFAD)....

Yet, this was the perfect opportunity to dream....to wish upon a star, to recharge, breathe new air into anything that was dying...inevitably, you would take a leap closer to making your dream a reality. 

Ok, now that it's all over, JUST SMILE!  :-)

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Represent Your Set...

Growing up in Connecticut, you come to hold on to what little sport there is in the state.  Sitused between Boston and New York you are either a Red Sox or a Yankees fan (the Mets, who?); a Celtics or a Knicks fan.  Ever since the Whalers were yanked away from us, and the only person with more fake crap in him than "Kraft" macaroni & cheese, Robert Kraft had a state on the edge of our seats at the hope of becoming home to the New England Patriots, only to find out we were but a pawn in his chess game, we have been professional "teamless".  For goodness sakes, they even took away our CBA!

But one thing that has remained a constant is our love of University of Connecticut (UCONN) Basketball.  Our Lady and Men Huskies reign supreme here as they should.  Coaches Jim Calhoun and Geno Auriemma have built an empire, second to none.  I am not going to get into a technical discussion about basketball, because frankly....I can't.  I was a Cheerleader for goodness sakes (TFAD!) - INSERT SPIRIT FINGERS HERE!

As the UCONN men started to open the country's eyes to how bad, (in the words of the great Run DMC, "not bad meaning bad, but bad meaning good"), they were, to finally clenching the 2011 National Championship, UCONN Alum banded together in bars, at homes and through social media - FaceBook and Twitter as ONE community!  I couldn't tell you that it was one particular thing for me that made this season uber Exciting (yep, I said uber, what?!)  Was it:
  • Watching my "brother-in-law" grow into his role as Assistant Coach?  Sorry, I am biased, but I am so extremely proud of this man!  I am going to brag...because I can!  He is a fabulous man of GOD, husband, father, uncle and role model.  We have watched him go from being a UCONN player to the CBA to the NBA to come back "home" as part of the Coaching team at UCONN.  We are so proud of you!  We went out after the parade and people asked Nemo what was his favorite part, he said it was "Seeing Uncle Kevin, Auntie Steph, Cheyanne and Taryn".  He had no CLUE who the players were.  He was so proud of his "Uncle"! 
  • Watching the games play out and as they got through each level, shattering brackets all over the country hoping that this turned out to be a true "Cinderella" story?
  • Looking at the 7 Freshman "man up" and show the country that (in the words of the late great Aaliyah "age, ain't nuthin' but a number, throwin' down ain't nuthin' but a thang"....
This was a perfect time to come together as a UCONN family, and "Represent Your Set"
Me and Nemo Spedeemo, representin' our set!

Maybe I'm biased because I am married to a certified parade chaser.  This man is LATE for everything.  I am SURE, he is going to be late for his own funeral, but when it comes to parades...we gotta get their early, make sure we get a good parking space AND a good viewing spot.  (The sun has to hit just right, the crowd around us has to be right...it's serious biz, but I digress and this is DEFINITELY a TFAD!)

But there is NO REASON, that everyone who has a degree from UCONN, who patronized any bar to watch a UCONN game, or FB'd, Tweeted, talked at a water cooler or for that matter LIVED in CT should not have been there.  Remember what I said above, these are kids!  Just last year, 1/2 of them were at prom!  As we bring our kids from here to there, from one activity to another, AAU, Premier Soccer, Dance, Voice Lessons, etx. we are doing this because we love our kids and we support them.  Let's not forget, that MOST of these kids are far away from their homes (from as close as Mansfield to as far away as Germany and Nigeria), WE are that village that is helping to raise them.

For one hour out of your day, we owed it to them.  Soooo, the next time, BECAUSE BELIEVE, ME/YOU, THERE WILL BE A NEXT TIME, make sure that you are acting a complete fool, cheering for OUR kids, like I did!   LOSE YOUR MIND!

Lt. Governor Wyman, still rockin' the stilleto's

Three the Hard Way
Does this count as Husky Blue?

I love the fact that somebody silly stringed Gov. Malloy's secret service car

See you there!  Goodnight!

Nemo and his "Bolden Brothers" were knocked out before we even got to the parade!

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Clean Jerks

So CF Open WOD #3 is done. 

This WOD was pretty straight and to the point.  The weight however was heavy.  The WOD was 5 minutes, AMRAP 110# Squat Clean and Jerk. 

Going into this WOD, I felt a lot better than I did the week prior.  In CrossFit I generally don't have a problem lifting heavy things.  But this WOD would be a test of both strength and endurance.  My goal was simply to get 20 rounds after I saw what others were getting, I felt as though that number would be a challenge yet manageable.  I felt even more confident after going through the prep WOD, Thursday night with Coach Wheels.  (Sidenote:  He has done a fabulous job of getting us ready for the movements for the upcoming WOD's without taxing our bodies!)

So, Saturday morning, I went in, ready to go....After watching the video (thanks Shirley, it's ok that most of the video is in 4 second increments, because you forgot you were doing video vs. camera, it helped me critique my movements better!  Thanks!), I realized how anxious I was from the beginning.

One of the things that is great about CrossFit, is that it is not a SPECIALIST sport.  The whole concept centers around the activities being constantly varied.  So far, the CF Open WOD's have played to that.  Last week was a body weight WOD (which I suck at tremendously).  Push ups do not come easy to me at all!  So, this week, I used what I knew I had and kept at it to achieve and surpass my goal of 20 rounds.  By the time it was all said and done, I got 23 rounds!!!!  Is that going to get me to California, no?!  But based on the year that I have had, it was the personal Ego boost that I needed.  And yes, I too have a big ego (TFAD)....

So, as I mentioned earlier, I knew going in that I wanted 20 rounds.  So, I spent a lot of time doing the math.  (What can I say, math, like push ups and so many other things is not a strong suit of mine!)  I decided I was going to pace myself and get 1 set (a clean and a jerk) every 15 seconds and I would be so in!  As I stepped to the bar, I listened to my Judge "Baby Mark" who reminded me that I was strong, relax and just GO!  He told me I was going to get tired anyway, so just go and do what I can.  So I listened and totally LOST my original plan.  In the first minute, I surprised myself on how many sets I got.  And he was right I was exhausted in the last minutes as evidenced by the video below.  But, I finished and I made sure each rep counted!  Thanks Coach Baby Mark! 

Once again, shout out to all athletes who engaged BEAST mode and just KILLED it!  Whether you are a general heavy lifter, or this was a new PR for you, Congrats!

On to WOD#4, enough to humble us all! 

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

I Need a Doctor...

Stop!  Watch this video, make sure to listen to the lyrics....

If you are like me, and you are a fan of hip hop, you had to stop again, watch the video and listen again!

Yeah, I think know what you're thinking...
  1. the song is a bit vulgar (sorry to those who are offended), or
  2. the beat is bananas (should we be surprised), or
  3. I need to go cop that Eminem CD (which I strongly encourage if you haven't already), or
  4. dang Dr. Dre is getting all cock diesel (I got to stay on my grind...), or
  5. who is that girl in the hook, when is her solo CD coming out (I'm impressed by her body of work http://www.skylargreymusic.com/), or
  6. this is REAL hip hop (TFAD), or
  7. Thais get to your point!
I love hip hop, I will address how hip hop has shaped my life another day....

But this is a song, that leaves a defining impact on you whether you are a hip hop head or a country junkie...It's a song about reaching back to those who have brought us forward...

The song is basically the story of how Eminem is now encouraging the hip hop legendary Producer, Artist, Writer and Engineer Dr. Dre to come back out with the work that his fans love and adore. 

Em references the support Dre provided...

"all I know is you came to me when I was at my lowest
you picked me up, breathing life in me
I owe my life to you
but for the life of me, I don't see why you don't see like I do
but it just dawned on me you lost a son
demons fighting you, it's dark.
let me turn on the lights and brighten me and enlighten you
I don't think you realize what you mean to me
not the slightest clue
'Cause me and you were like a crew
I was like your sidekick
you gon either wanna fight me when I get off this f#$%ing mic
or you gon hug me
But I'm out of options, there's nothing else I can do"

Crazy, but this makes me think of my Grandmother , affectionately known as "Nonnie"....She raised my Mom as a single Mother and my Mom raised me as a single Mom.  We were a tight crew.  She was, and still is, an integral part of the "village" that raised me.  I have fond memories of Girl Scouts, being active in our respective Episcopal Churches, shopping, baking, and crafts. 

Hey Beautiful!  Now it's my turn...  Love You Nonnie xoxoxoxo!

But since my Mom passed away, her light doesn't shine as bright.  Roles have become reversed and that has been a difficult process.  She took on the lions share of being a caregiver to two family members, when she herself needed help.  Now, that it is time for her to receive care, it is difficult.  She still sees me as a 6 yr old little girl.  So, the "adult" conversations are hard to come by.  The information flow is cryptic at best. 

She is incapable in so many ways of doing the things that she once did that I can tell her spirit is broken, she seems defeated.  I can't imagine the pain that she has gone through in losing her best friend, her only child, my Mom.  I just hope that through Nemo and I she comes back!  My sincere hope is that she can continue to embrace her as Great Grandmother to Nemo Spedeemo (that part comes easy) and accept me in my role in trying to help save her in her elder years (not so easy)!  Nonnie, I love you, big hugs and kisses (note, anyone that has been hugged by Nonnie questions whether or not she was a wrestler in her past life.  She hugs you so tight it's a mini workout, but that is how much love is within every square inch of her body)....

He speaks of the sacrifices that Dre made for him:

"it was you who believed in me
when everyone was telling you don't sign me
Everyone at the f#$%ing label
let's tell the truth you risked your career for me
I know it as well as you

nobody wanted to f#$k with the white boy"

Can you think of anyone that put their necks on the line for you?  Someone who did everything that they could to see you "come up"? 

For me personally, I think of one of my bosses. 

There was a point in my career when I had to battle a company I was working for due to disparaging remarks one of the Executives, my direct boss at the time made about my race.  As one of few minorities in the Corporate world I was the David and the Company was the Goliath.  All of my Executive "friends" were protecting the Company and not doing what was right by me (SURPRISE!)  But there was one person.  One person who recognized what was wrong and stood  up with me, my boss. 

By the time I left the organization, I had a different outlook on life.  My Mom had just passed away (TFAD)  and I got this attitude that "NOTHING is really that important to stress you out"  "At the end of the day, none of it is really all that serious".  I took some time off from the job search and just focused on "getting my mind right".  During my "downtime", that ONE person checked on me often.  He encouraged me from the sidelines and reminded me of my value to any organization. 

I am fortunate enough to work with him again.  He is a successful buisnessman, but more importantly, he is a mentor.  He makes it a point to to stop what he does and recognize hard work and stresses the importance of a good work life balance.  I still laugh about the 10:30P phone call I received from him when Nemo was an infant with an ear infection and he called to tell me in his gritty voice to "be careful to make sure that he doesn't go deaf!"  As rough and rugged as it was, I knew and I always know it comes from a good place.  He loves his hometown, he loves his Christ, and these are but a few of the reasons I love him! 


I can go on for days naming my mentors, Geneva "Mamacita" Black in Philly (TFAD), Aunt Lily (TFAD), Mr. Charles Williams and Mrs. Regina Warner (TFAD), Fr. Overton Gilkes and Fr. Victor Rogers (TFAD), Mrs. Pam Kelley and Mrs. Virginia Brooks (TFAD), Coach Esposito (TFAD), My Uncle Raymond H. Paige, Jr. (TFAD), Mrs. Audrey Y. Smith (TFAD), Ashanti "Perry" & Dung Williams(TFAD), Mrs. Karen. Fleming (TFAD), my Love my Mom...but these are just a few....


Lose your selfishness.  Stop thinking about all of the things that you have going on with you.  Now that your mentors have helped you get to a certain phase in your life, what are you doing to reach back, reach next to or continue to reach up to them.  How about a simple note, phone call or better yet, just some time with them to express your gratitude, and remind them that they are STILL invaluable to you!  At some point in their lives they stopped their lives to help you, now it's your turn to return the favor!